dichotomy of the times

i've been wondering lately. is it possible to be a gadget freak - fascinated by all things new and electronic - and a luddite at the same time?

i get absolutely frothy every time the latest phone, camera, laptop or adobe update comes out. totally intrigued by the possibilities of twitter, facebook, blogs, microblogs, iphone apps (as productive tools), vimeo and flickr. i can multitask with the best of 'em, and truly relish the process. it's a game to me to see how much i can accomplish, with what technologies, how fast (not that i AM fast...I just like the challenge :)

but i'm at my most content when the phone is off, the laptop 2 floors away powered down in a dark office, the tv remote out of sight, the blinds slightly drawn to let in just the right amount of sunlight, and quietly ensconced with a book in my favorite chair.

obviously i'm a total introvert. but it's really more than that.

is it that my generation came of age without all this technology? so perhaps isn't convinced by the absolute necessity of it all?

although i didn't grow up on a farm, i remember hearing stories from my mother and grandparents about a more rural, bucolic life. with chickens, cotton, corn and tobacco to tend. for the romantics of my generation - who probably all have similar memories - i think that existence seems more admirable...and made of more true substance that the lives we actually lead.

i'm not suggesting that anyone wants to turn the clock back. the internet, twitter, cell phones, and the like have irreversibly changed the social, political and business climate of our world. we should take advantage of every technology available. however, BECAUSE the world has changed so dramatically - through technology - there are now avenues open to each of us that were never possible in previous generations.

example. i'm an editor / motion graphics gal. my sweet g is a chemist. we've had predictably middle class upbringings. our lives are steeped in technology. but we also love to be outdoors and see things grow. my husband's got such a green thumb it's freakin mossy. but because of the communication tools available to us...because of the recent turn towards locally grown, organic produce...we totally dream of living on a working farm. and the reality is that it COULD BE. it's an honest to goodness POSSIBILITY (if we could only find the courage to change)!

So that where I end for the night. Twitter as a communication tool for farmers. Ha! Seriously? What am I thinking? I can see where you'd be doubtful.

But I'm not kidding! Just a little tired. Hot yoga really kicked my butt tonight!

(*_*)

sweet pea's 1st photo shoot

revision 072709

how exactly does a parent - and more specifically a mama - redefine herself as the kids grow up? i realize the question is a tad premature given that our sweetpea is just 4...but she needs me less and less every day. some days that fact overwhelms me with sadness, and i yearn for the days when i could carry her on my hip 24/7.

but...slowly...i'm stretching my legs into a once more independent life. yippee, right? so why am i so stuck? so at odds with the potentials?

hence the question. now that i'm free to be "me" a little more often...how to rediscover who that person is and what she wants? because to be honest, she feels like a total stranger.

so. here's to my sweetpea. whose growing up has allowed me to see my life again. to see the potential in her is to see the potential in every human being. myself included.